Athleta Embodiment Tights – Annette Didn’t Listen!
As a frugal shopper, Black Friday holds a special place in my heart.
This year, Athleta offered 20% off everything online, so I knew this was the running gods’ way of telling me that I did indeed need some new run tights. At 5’0, my options are always limited, and this proved to be true. Again.
I’m a huge fan of Sugoi because even their regular size “fits” me, but I decided that the love I have for my other Athleta items would surely translate to their running tights. Hmmm…well, I found my petite options very limited. In fact, the Athleta Be Free tights, which I absolutely LOVE in knickers (OK, capri length on me), were not available in petite. I do not understand the reasoning for this since my “capris” are in petite, but whatever.
After much Athleta perusing, I settled on the Athleta Embodiment tight. They were in petite, had an awesome design, and MB raved over them.
I should add, because she will add it if I don’t, that MB told me she likes to wear hers under other pieces of clothing. Because MB freezes at the mere mention of cold weather and because I become a puddle of sweat in 40 degree weather, I assumed that these would be perfect for me to wear . . . on their own.They arrived yesterday. They will be sent back tomorrow.
Yes, the design was quite cute and fun, and yes, they fit my petite frame perfectly.
They did not, however, pass the squat test. You see, the most humiliating moment of my life occurred at the gym during a body pump class, and it involved black capris that basically became see through when I squatted. And there are lots of squats involved in body pump. And I didn’t find out about this “issue” until I got home. And then it was my husband who told me he could see through them. SEE. THROUGH. THEM. And I had been in the front of the class that day. Geez.
Anyway, any time I purchase new bottoms, I do squats in front of my husband to ensure I’m not showing off more than I intended.
The Embodiment tights did not pass!!! (I won’t include the picture where you can actually read my underwear through the tights. You are welcome.) They should only be used as an undergarment, just like MB told me.
Yeah, yeah, I know.
I should have listened.
The real-time texts:
A-Hey MB have you tried the embodiment tights?
M-I have last years version. I love them. They are more like long underwear in my opinion* – if I run in them I definitely wear the hot cheeks over them or a really long shirt. They are thinner and like an insulating layer. (*Emphasis added by MB in her editorial discretion! Read on to see why . . . )
A- Well shoot. I wanted to buy the red ones. Those won’t work with my skirt. I’ll just buy boring black.
. . .
D- Well, did you all get your stuff?
L-I hope I got mine. I haven’t been home yet ☹
A-I haven’t been home yet either!!! Gym. Ugh. Want my tights!
K-Mine came today! Haven’t opened it yet. Mom duties took precedence.
A-Well mine came today too. I will be sending it back immediately. The tights didn’t pass the squat test. B could read my brand of underwear. He took a pic for me. It’s really bad.
K- What are they?
A- The embodiment ones.
D- A, I think they are supposed to be like long underwear.
A- Really????? D4MN!!!!!!!!!
MB- I told you that!!!
A- You said you like to wear them under things. You wear four layers at all times. I thought these would be perfect for me!!!
. . .
M – I’m going to have to find that text!! I believe I even said the words “like long underwear” in it! And that I always wear something over them to hide my butt!
D- Take a picture and we will take a vote.
[Photo of A’s butt]
D- I meant with the skirt!!
A- Hahaha!!! I’m not putting them back on! They’re going back!